Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
