ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize