Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
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