ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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