fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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