I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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