ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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