Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
