sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
handjob tips. give me some.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
