first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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