my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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