Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
