Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
