hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
