Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
