Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
