super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
