as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
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