She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Do you remember whose house we're in?
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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