Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I am naked and annoyed.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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