Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize