So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
