People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
