ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
