problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
