my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize