break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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