Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
