What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I can't trust your balls anymore.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
