I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
