If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in itâ€
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