"it" just moved
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
