Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Randomize
