how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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