I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
The convent might be a nice break from real life
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
