I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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