i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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