peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
