great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
