I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
