No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
