I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
