In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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