do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Randomize
