Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
