Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
