Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
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