I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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