Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
