All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
