Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
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