You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Randomize
